


A Darkness Unheard Of

by kennedie_exe



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Depression, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Poor Prompto, References to Depression, Sadness, Self-Doubt, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Uh so this is sad, Unrequited Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-28
Updated: 2017-11-28
Packaged: 2019-02-07 23:38:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12851976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kennedie_exe/pseuds/kennedie_exe
Summary: Life is but a misery in Prompto's eyes. Unnecessary really and it's not like he matters to anyone. No one cared about him. Only time will tell if he will get better. It's a long rode for him especially if all he's ever felt was darkness.Or Prompto's journey of a depression episode.





	A Darkness Unheard Of

**Author's Note:**

> This took me MONTHS to write. I had this idea back in August and kept coming up with ideas and finally finished it. I'm in an abnormal psychology class and also read a book about someone battling depression thus this fic was officially born. It's 7.1k of sadness honestly. 
> 
> Enjoy~

His sleep was deprived. His thoughts have been haunting him more recently now. Prompto isn't sure why all of a sudden but it's been awhile since he felt this way. Not since a year ago when… he almost,  _ almost… _ He doesn't want to think about that time of weakness. Now, Prompto never really had an amazing life. His so called parents were too busy for him so he always felt neglected, he had a lot of insecurities and self doubt; Never really feeling highly of himself and he never thought that he truly belonged amongst others. Back then, that bridge was his escape. His sweet release from his life. He had hit such a low point. He felt bad though. Not a lot of people knew about his problems and he hid it so well behind that fake sun-shiny attitude of his. But when he was alone, he'd cry himself to sleep at night and those thoughts would plague him. He was having too many restless nights now. Back on that bridge, a good samaritan talked him out of it. He didn't know who it was but they told him how he was worth something to this world just like all people are; that he should continue living his life to the fullest. That was probably the first time Prompto ever felt like someone actually cared about him. He broke down crying and ended up calling his friends about it. They were all shocked and so worried for him; no one saw this coming. He immediately got help. He couldn't feel so low anymore. 

 

That was a year ago. 

 

He's been good for a while now, or at least for a year now. He was diagnosed with MDD or Major Depressive Disorder as soon as he started seeing a psychotherapist. It's depression in which one is in a state of feeling normal until they go down to major lows. It's a cycle of feeling decently normal to feeling extremely sad; the depressive state. The therapy sessions were good for Prompto and they actually made him feel a lot better. It was a rocky start with him always insisting that he was okay, but soon he was able to open up to his therapist about what his feelings were. Throughout the year, with a lot of one on one talks, group therapy (which was the worse), and a mild dose of antidepressants, Prompto actually felt normal again. No more fake smiles or laughs but genuine happiness. He soon ended the sessions after he felt like he didn't need those anymore but kept up a low dosage of his antidepressants. He never felt so free, so happy. Self healing was what he needed now. The rode to natural recovery was upon him-

 

It… didn't last long. 

 

Like any other depressive disorder, it never really goes away. It comes back. Some of the time, unfortunately, it tends to come back worse than before. The symptoms hit Prompto all at once. For a few weeks now, he couldn't sleep, eat, or he just felt exhausted. His motivation to get out of bed most days were low and sometimes he didn't get out of bed. The idea of food sickened him. His low dosage of antidepressants weren't working anymore and he's beginning to feel so worthless. 

 

So drained. 

 

_ So… Sad.  _

 

Not the sadness that one feels from upsetting things. This was something more intense that persisted with each passing day. It's distressing and near disabling. He’s only had a negative mindset on things lately. He's cried himself asleep more often than not and ends up laying awake thinking not the best of thoughts. That god forsaken low episode was coming on; making an unwanted appearance once again. He begins to ponder on a world without him in it on those sleepless night. It's not good for him, he knows it, but he thinks the world wouldn't mind losing a person. The world would be better off without him. No… He can't think that, but- that's all he's been thinking as of late. 

 

He's pretending again which probably isn't his best move either. He's gotten too good at the whole ‘fake it until you make it’ attitude. He honestly doesn't want to worry his friends about his mental state. They'll get too worried and he doesn't want to be babied by them or be a burden for that matter. He should have consulted someone or called his therapist again but he believes he'll make it through on his own. He's done it once and he'll do it again. He could get through this. 

 

But… 

 

Prompto feels worse almost. He's dreading each day now and those negative thoughts are cycling through his head constantly telling him how useless he is. Who knew thoughts could be so terrible and detrimental? He feels awful. He feels weak.  _ Worthless _ . It's been so long since he's been so low and all that self doubt, that he hadn't dealt with in a long time, was back. He began to believe that he truly was an incompetent nobody that will not amount to anything in his life. A mess of hang ups. Those thoughts were degrading him. He wished he could just stop over thinking. 

 

He's trying to control those thoughts, he really is, but he can't. They hurt him too deeply every moment of every day and the emotional toll that comes from them are too much sometimes. It's a constant nag to his conscious that yes, he is worthless. Without resorting to…  _ certain _ actions and circumstance, he relieves his pain with something else which again, probably isn't a good idea: cutting. Okay, it's a very bad idea but he's become desperate and the thoughts are slowly shrinking his rationale to actually get help again or seek out a friend. Only one cut and he won't do it anymore. Just to calm his thoughts down. 

 

He started cutting more frequently; practically each day now. He just can't seem to shake those nasty thoughts out anymore without a little something to distract him. A little something to take the edge off. That small pocket knife had became his best friend over these few odd weeks turned months. It's almost like a rush goes through him when he makes the first slash to the wrist. The slight physical pain ebbs away his mental pain for the time being. In hindsight, it made him feel better. 

 

Sometimes it doesn't help. 

 

Prompto begins to contemplate his life as a whole and overall, it's always been so shitty. His friends, they don't really need him. No one ever needed him before. He just a waste of space really. So weak, so useless, and he just doesn't know why he's on this earth anymore. No… He can't think this. His mental state is definitely regressing but he doesn't want to admit it. He smiles with his friends all the time or at least tried to. It was becoming harder to do so nowadays. The guys never questioned him about it and Prompto just kept up his facade. They didn't ask if he's okay because they don't know what he's dealing with or, as his brain wants him to think, they simply don't care. No one cared. Those small spikes of anxiety began to flare up. He would clam up when spoken to along with just staying more quiet than he usually was around his friends. That’s when they would jokingly ask why he was so quiet some days and Prompto put on a very forced smile responding that he was just tired. That wasn’t necessarily a lie. He’s been so exhausted as of late and he just couldn’t sleep at all. Not with his thoughts spiraling out of control. 

 

Things… only worsen. 

 

The idea of taking his own life was a thought in which he pondered more on than he should. It’s been so long since he pondered this thought of simply ending all of his pain. The sad part was, that he could do it so easily; so quickly, quietly, and no one would even know, or care for that matter, that he was gone. When one feels so worthless, does living even matter anymore? Prompto doesn’t think so. He trying his hardest not to repeatedly think of the many, quite intriguing, ways he could possibly end his life. He writes these idea down actually in a small notebook and keeps it hidden. If anyone found it, well… they won’t find it. He hides it well just like he hides all of his emotional turmoil. 

 

More weeks go by and Prompto stopped talking to his friends all together; completely closed off. He doesn’t mean to really, completely unintentional, but his anxiousness was through the roof and any sort of communication would put him into panic mode. The whole ‘I’m busy/tired’ excuse wasn’t liable anymore. His friends notice something was different about him but they don't press it. Prompto doesn't know if he should have been glad or sad that they don't. The sense of guilt hangs over him since he hadn’t told his friends about his issues but in true, they wouldn’t care anyways.

 

Probably one of the more heart wrenching reasons he’s so depressed is dealing with feelings that he knows would not be returned. 

 

An unrequited crush. 

 

It's really stupid but it just pains him even more; eating at his mind persistently. Every time Prompto saw his crush he just felt even worse because he knows the feelings weren't mutual. Why would they be? Who would like someone as fucked up as he was? Who would want someone so worthless, useless, weak- the list goes on but in any rate, no one would like him. If anything, they’d probably treat him as a liability. The prince, after all, would definitely not want to deal with Prompto and his mental problems. They were closer friends than the others and Prompto still believes that Noctis is just pretending to like him. A rational thought would be that Noctis was always there for him when he felt so low. His first episode was easier to go through because Noctis would help him through it while also keeping his spirits up. That rationale was shot. His thoughts were increasingly clouded with unforeseen darkness that could possibly never be fixed. He would never truly see the light of happiness.

 

The many times Noctis would call him, he’d put on his rehearsed, happy voice and say all was good. He’s acting avoidant. Another reason to feel guilty because he wants to think that Noctis is worried about him and yet, he doesn’t explicitly voice his concern. Or, maybe Noctis just isn’t interested in him. He believes that the latter is the honest truth. They haven’t hung out in a long time and Noctis brings it up that maybe they should do just that. Prompto is hesitant at this. His blundering mind comes up with only negative outcomes one after the other and Prompto almost denied the request. Getting out of bed was too difficult enough as it is but he goes along with it anyways regardless.

 

Even when it’s just him and Noctis, his emotions are going haywire. He hides it though. He’ll smile and even keep up regular conversation but his mind repeatedly tells him that he’s nothing more than an inconvenience. It wasn’t a smart thing to do but when Noctis left to go to the bathroom, Prompto took the time to do just one small cut. It’s quick, a bit painful, but it calmed him down. The blood flowed down his arm slowly, intriguing. He had to clean it before Noctis got back even if it was interesting to watch. It’s a sick, twisted, ideology. It made Prompto want to cut more but he can’t, not right now at least. He patched his arm up and retrieved a jacket to cover all the scars he had scattered up his arm. Noctis returns and Prompto pretends that nothing ever happened; Just like how he's been pretending on everything recently; His smiles and laughs, it's all false emotions. 

His heart begins to ache. He so much wanted to tell Noctis that he’s been pining for him for years now but a las, Noctis would probably think he’s joking or even laugh in his face about it. He keeps it to himself nonetheless. When their hang out session was done, Noctis leaves with a reassuring smile and a comment that he’d always be there for Prompto. That Prompto could tell him anything. The blonde forced a smile and nodded his head in response, but Noctis just had to make one small comment that made Prompto’s heart shatter.

 

“I'll always be there for you. You’ll always be my best friend. Don’t ever think otherwise.” Noctis spoke gently and Prompto had to hold it together until he finally left. 

 

He screams.

 

He crumbles to his knees onto the floor, crying out his unwanted feelings. This was what true pain felt like. He doesn’t take that comment lightly and it only rang even louder in his head.  _ Just a friend… Nothing _ else. He doesn't realize it, but he's taking those words too seriously. He's overreacting but his brain makes him think that Noctis doesn't like him at all. Shouldn’t he be ecstatic that Noctis saw him as a friend at all? He should, but his feelings just left him heartbroken.  _ Noctis hates him. _ He clutched his chest as if he had a hold of his heart; it hurt so much. His crush was just that, unrequited. He doesn’t know why but this revelation was setting him off so much. This only made him feel more worthless, useless; a  _ liability _ . If Noctis didn't care for him, who else would actually care for him? His whole body began to ache. Physical pain, emotional pain; he wanted it all to stop. He's self-destructing; completely shutting down. He let's out another scream. He couldn’t take this anymore.

 

He couldn't live like this anymore. 

 

Prompto never knew comprising a note such as this would be something so difficult to do but he had to do it. He had a lot of people to thank and commend along with a few special thanks. He feels bad because his parents don’t even know anything about his mentality since they were so busy but they neglected him nonetheless so it’s not like they’d care. Again, no one cared which was why he had to do this. He waited a while. What he was going to do had to be commenced in the late hours of the night so no one could see him. He packs a small bag that held his camera full of memories, his personal notebook, and a single note for Noctis’s eyes only. It was just about the right time to leave. He says one last goodbye to his apartment before heading out his door. His strides to his destination were slow, almost as if apart of him is trying to prevent himself from doing this but the major part of him screams that yes, this was the only answer to all his troubles. Why deal with your pain when you can just stop it all completely? Prompto was about to have no more troubles, no more pain or intrusive thoughts. He will finally see the light.

 

He sits looking out over the quiet city. A little over a year has passed and he was back at this same spot; The Insomnia Bridge. It’s his safe place, or as it should be noted as, the place that’ll be the cause of his fateful death. No one was around and it proved to be the right time. He won’t be talked out of this. He sits close to the edge and looks down. He winced because the bridge was extremely high up but he puts on a sad smile. It was perfect. He closes his eyes just to bask in the cool air around him. It’s quiet, tranquil even, but Prompto was far from feeling anything close to serenity.

 

He isn’t sure why he hasn’t jumped yet. He doesn’t want to psyche himself out but he still has that small part in him that faintly tells him that this was wrong. That thought alone was nowhere near as overpowering as the thoughts that were engraved into him already. It'll be so quick just to jump. He resisting though and he doesn't know why. Maybe that small thought was more overpowering than he thought. It tells him that he should go see Noctis. It's funny because Prompto knew Noctis wouldn't get up to see him; definitely not at this hour. 

 

He humored that thought. He thinks it as a one-last-time to say goodbye to Noctis officially. Maybe he'll just slip the letter under his door and walk back. There's no stopping his motive tonight. Prompto reluctantly goes to Noctis’s house. He unaware of the time but knew it had to be very late. He can't believe this would be the first time, in a long time, that Noctis would see the person Prompto has been hiding from him, from everyone. The person Prompto had become. Upon actually reaching Noctis’s house, overwhelming dread spread all over him. Why was he here when he could have just been gone already? He rang the doorbell nonetheless and waited before knocking on the door. A few minutes go by and he soon accepted that Noctis won't come to him. He makes it an incentive; if Noctis doesn't come, it's all the more reason for him to go back to the bridge. Remember, Noctis doesn't like him. 

 

He waits a bit longer before he deemed it not worth waiting any longer and began to walk away. He freezes when he hears the door beginning to open and he turns back around tentatively with his head hanging low.

 

* * *

 

4:17am was the time on the clock when the doorbell rang loudly throughout Noctis’s apartment. Noctis tossed and turned in his bed trying to ignore it but it rang again. He  _ hates _ getting woken up at all let alone in the middle of the fucking night. He honestly hoped that whoever the fuck was there would leave. It's quiet for a while before his door was being knocked on. Who would be up at this hour and why did they have to come and bother him? He shuffled out of bed, threw on a shirt, and headed towards the door. This better be fucking important if this person really was at his apartment at this hour. He reached the door and looked through the peephole. It was night obviously so it was hard to see who it was and it didn't help since this person was wearing a dark colored hoodie that covered their head. He thinks for a moment that what if this was a burglar? He pushed the thought aside simply because a burglar would probably just break in instead of knocking on his door. Well, unless he was being baited. Nevertheless, he sighs and finally, slowly opens his door.

 

Noctis is met with blue eyes briefly that immediately looked down and a bit of blonde hair can be seen out the hood. This man was slouching, hands in his pockets looking down. 

 

“P-prompto? Why the hell are you here so late dude?” Yeah it was Prompto. It sucked because now it's almost 4:30am and Noctis really wanted to go back to bed. The yawn was a dead give away on how tired he was. 

 

“C-can I come in?” Prompto asked and his voice was small, almost strained; distant. Now Noctis wanted to say no but it's his best friend and he seemed a bit off from when they hung out recently that day. 

 

“Uh yeah sure…” He said reluctantly with a sigh and gestured for Prompto to come in. Prompto stepped in and Noctis closed the door and turned on the lights. Prompto walked in, with his backpack on, towards the couch with his head still hanging low and sat on it laying his head in his lap. This was a bit weird for Noctis. Was Prompto just going to sleep here? Why didn't he call and ask to come over and why come so late of all times? Prompto's apartment wasn't that far from his place. About a 20 minute walk which never bothered Prompto before. Noctis wondered why he didn't just walk home. The air seems so thin and way too quiet. Prompto is  _ never _ this quiet. Their early hang out seemed fine, fun even, so why was Prompto so… silent? He even ensured the blonde that he would always be there for him. Moreover, Prompto just seemed… different; more reclusive. Noctis sat down next to Prompto and let out a long sigh that may have sound more annoyed than intended. 

 

“Hey so dude, why are you here? You're welcome anytime but… It's almost 4:30am. Not the most ideal time to drop by.” He tried to joke but the atmosphere still felt stale. Prompto remained silent. He didn't even budge from his position. Noctis began to feel a bit worried and uneasy. Why was Prompto acting so strangely? Noctis decided to pry at him. 

 

“Hey are you… okay? Did something happen? You're usually smiling and joking about something ridiculous.” Another lighthearted joke and Prompto still didn't move. Noctis placed a hand on the blonde's shoulder and he felt him tense up immediately. Prompto soon looked up at him and- he looked… different. His skin was pale, too pale. Noctis got a better look at him and noticed that his eyes were glossy, empty looking; It almost looked like he was crying recently. 

 

“Prompto you have to talk to me. What happened? Are you okay?” Noctis said this time more seriously. The air was suffocating and he just wanted Prompto to say something, anything. Prompto let out a weak sigh and sat up so his elbows were on his knees. He shook his head slowly, giving a weak, sad smile. 

 

“I-I’m… just so, totally fine…” His voice cracked the slightest in a whisper tone. Definitely not fine at all. That statement cut through Noctis and something clicked inside him. Prompto was in one of  _ those _ mindsets. It's been a long time since Prompto was like this. Noctis knew of his depression and he did everything he could to make sure he was happy and okay when  _ those _ dark thoughts resurfaced full forced. 

 

Usually Prompto was a happy person or at least tries to be happy. It's been a little over  a year since Prompto's last episode and at that time he wasn't at his best. He shut himself out from everyone including Noctis at one point, but Noctis continued to help him. Probably the worse thing Noctis ever had to hear able was getting a call from Prompto himself telling him that he almost killed himself by jumping off the bridge. Noctis had never felt so bad for not seeing the signs even more. Prompto got immediate help and since then, things were good. Or at least Noctis believed things were good. 

 

About a few months back, Prompto stopped seeing his therapist since he actually felt good. He still took his medication though out of precaucion. He felt like he was finally, genuinely happy again, and he was. Noctis knew when he was faking it and over the past few months, he seemed actually happy. Now though, Prompto was just like he was a year ago. As Noctis thinks about it, Prompto did seem a bit avoidant when they hung out earlier; Even so with all of his friends. Fuck, how long has Prompto been like this? 

 

“Talk to me.” Noctis spoke. Prompto let out a short laugh. Noctis couldn't possibly care about him. He felt near psychotic right now. He wants to laugh at this whole bitter situation. He looked towards Noctis straight into those blue eyes of his. Prompto always loved those eyes. Those eyes alone, when looking in his direction, would make him swoon but now those eyes, in which Prompto thinks, are filled with unmistakably pity. He doesn't want Noctis’s pity. 

 

Is it worth telling Noctis that this would be the last time he'll see him or should he keep it as a fucked up surprise? Telling him straight away would probably cause major problems and Prompto, again, won't be stopped this time. He honestly doesn't want to deal with this. Noctis does looked highly concerned about him but Prompto waves it off. Again, it has to be pity.  _ Noctis thinks you're a liability _ . That phrases pounded in his head. Prompto let's out another weak sigh and cracked a forced smile. 

 

“The Insomnia Bridge is beautiful at night, ya know? It's pretty high up. Looking down… It's memorizing. The concrete looked especially… impenetrable tonight.” He paused and saw Noctis’s expression shift from mock concern to mock surprise. He laughs at this change. 

 

“Prompto-”

 

“Don't even pretend that you care. After all, I'm just your ‘best friend and nothing more’, right? Even then you were pretending. Everyone has been pretending to care!” Prompto interrupted with a heightened voice. There was a hint of anger there. He wasn't exactly sure why he was angry. His emotions were just running everywhere now. Definitely something due to his psychosis. Noctis had placed both of his hands onto his shoulders firmly and began shaking him. 

 

“What the hell? Prompto I care about you so much. Why would you even think-” His question was cut off by yet another sad laugh. 

 

“Pity. I don't want it from you. I just wanted to say goodbye is all.” He began and saw Noctis’s eyes grow wide. “I think I've spent enough time here…” He spoke and shrugged Noctis’s hands off his shoulders. Noctis, himself, was paralyzed in disbelief. Prompto was… suicidal again? When had this all started? Why hadn't Prompto talk to him about how he felt? Noctis especially felt bad because he could never tell. Even earlier today seemed nice but, as Noctis now notes, it was a ruse. Prompto began to stand up and Noctis immediately grabbed him. The blonde retracted his arm and made haste towards the door. He had to get out of here. Noctis immediately tackled him to the ground causing Prompto to scream and struggle. 

 

“Please calm down. Everything is okay.” Noctis voiced slowly, soothingly, but Prompto continued to struggle. 

 

“N-no! Get off me! I c-can’t live like this anymore! You don't care. No one ever cared!” He screamed out. “Th-the bridge… I have to go back…” He's becoming more hysterical. He's crying because he's in so much pain and laughing sadly because it's hilarious hearing Noctis sound like he cares. Noctis had a strong grip on him. His own mind was racing too fast with this situation. Prompto was not in the right mind at all. 

 

“Prompto listen to me. There's so many people who care for you.” Noctis began and Prompto just shook his head. 

 

“It's a lie. I'm worthless, I'm useless… Just a waste of space. Nothing more than a fucking inconvenience. The world is better off without me.” He stated. Noctis couldn't believe this. Prompto has grown worse to his condition right under Noctis’s eyes. Noctis kept him pinned down but the blonde continued to squirm. He's never heard Prompto sound so broken; so deprived of self-worth that he'd take his own life. He can't let Prompto do that. He can't let Prompto go. 

 

“Prompto, listen to me. You aren't none of those things. You are so special to me.” He tries to get through to Prompto but the struggle was only getting harder. 

 

“Please don't…. D-don't say that to me. I know what I am; y-you don't have to lie. Why won't you j-just let me go? I'm better off not being in a world I'm not wanted in. I'm better off dead!” Prompto only cried and struggled harder but Noctis had a firm grasp on him. 

 

“Prompto… I can't. I can't have you walking away to your end. I can't watch someone so close to me, so important to me end their life. You mean so much to me and-

 

“Fuck you! I don't want to hear this! If you were really my friend, you'd let me go! Don't you want me to not be in agony anymore? My heart hurts Noct… Everything hurts so damn much and I-I can't deal with this pain anymore. Quit making me suffer!” Noctis was so baffled by all of this. Seeing Prompto teetering so low on the spectrum of depression was worse than Noctis could ever imagine. He's never seen Prompto so sad, so uncaring about anything let alone his own life. Prompto needed help and Noctis was going to be the first step towards helping him. 

 

“Prompto, you're my best friend. And… and I like you so much more than that. I want you to believe me. You're everything to me. I've liked you for so long and I want you to know that. I truly care for you and everyone else does too. P-please… please don't take your life. I need you so much.” Noctis was pleading with tears streaking down his face. 

 

Prompto’s struggle slowly subsided. 

 

In true, he was exhausted right now. It was already late plus all his struggling just made him wear himself out. He couldn't put up a fight anymore but… He feels a little different. He couldn't fathom it but part of him, that was becoming more prominent now, was telling him that Noctis was telling the truth. It's been so long since he had an actual good thought cross his mind. It's too good to be true. He so much wanted to shove the thought aside deeming it false but it rings in his head. Was it true? Did Noctis… actually like him? The phrases ‘Just and friend’ and ‘He likes you more than that’ cycle through his head. The latter was growing stronger. 

 

Realization hits him. It hits him that he was making a terrible mistake. His actions were unjustified. It's hard though. His brain is so fucked up that even he doesn't know what he could have done. He began to sob softly; body going completely slack. Noctis was skeptical but he soon released him. When he met no resistance, he sat up and brought Prompto into a hug which only made him cry harder. 

 

“I… I-I’m sc-scared Noctis.” He spoke broken through his sobs. Noctis only held him tighter. 

 

“It's okay I got you. I will always be here for you.” Noctis said softly and Prompto actually hugged him back. 

 

“It's… so, s-so h-hard to b-believe you.” Prompto spoke softly through his tears. 

 

“Please believe me. I like you too much to see you do something so damaging. My life would be incomplete without you. I want you to know that. I want you to believe me.” Noctis reassured him and that just made Prompto cry even harder. 

 

It's been awhile since Prompto felt like  _ this _ . He feels his mind increasingly easing from his usual doubtful thoughts. His thoughts are more gentle to him right now. He was beginning to believe Noctis’s words and that makes his heart swell. He was… liked. Prompto never knew anyone could like him but seeing Noctis; hearing Noctis say how his own life would be incomplete without him was a nice realization. It makes him smile even and it's the first time in a long time it's not fake. 

 

“I'm s-so sorry.”

 

“It's okay. I'm gonna make some calls in the morning for you. I'm going to be there with you every step of the way through to help you. I'm not going to let you get so low again. I will be by your side in this. Always.” Noctis said serenely. He pulls back from the hug to let out a yawn and Prompto does another thing he hadn't done in a long time, genuinely at least; Laugh. 

 

“Sorry for waking you and keeping you up so late with… all of this.” Prompto stated but Noctis waved him off. 

 

“Don't be. You had a lot on your mind and wasn't in the right state of mind. Your wellbeing is more important.” Noctis began and stood them both up. “Let's go to bed. I'd put you in the guest room but… I kinda wanna watch you so I'd like you to sleep with me.” Noctis rushed the last part out and a small blushed formed on his face. 

 

“I… I get it. It's fine.” Prompto accepted and they soon retire to Noctis’s room. 

 

Prompto feels sleep come upon him easier than usual. It's been ages since the last time he had a decent night of sleep. His thoughts aren't intrusive or awful and he falls asleep fairly quickly. He was finally at peace. The greatest feeling ever was the feeling of mutual attraction between him and Noctis. Coming here was the right decision after all. 

 

Noctis is still shaken up by everything. He puts some blame on himself for Prompto’s conditions only because he should have known. He was really going to watch over him from now on. He doesn't want to see Prompto like that any more, ever again. It's unintentionally but Noctis wrapped his arms around Prompto. It's… safety reasons really but he feels Prompto lean into a bit more which makes him smile. Noctis ponders on the time and yeah, it's was almost 6am and he was so tired. It crosses his mind about a scenario in which he didn't get up to his doorbell or knocks. He definitely didn't want to think about that outcome; it's too painful to think about. He's glad he got up though. He may have lost some sleep but he's even more happy that he didn't lose someone so special to him. 

 

He saved Prompto’s life. 

 

* * *

 

Waking up and not feeling Prompto next to him sent Noctis into full panic. He shoots out of bed, scanning his room for any signs of the blonde. He let's out a sigh of relief. The shower was running. He was still worried though and it showed when he went to the bathroom door. He knocked on the door and hear Prompto respond with a ‘Yeah?’ and Noctis smiled. Good, Prompto was actually still here. Noctis went back to his bed deciding he'd wait for Prompto to make the calls. He noticed the bag Prompto had brought with him last night. Now, Noctis shouldn't be snooping but he feels like he had to see what Prompto was bringing to his death.

 

He opens the bag revealing only a few items. His camera, a notebook, and an envelop with Noctis’s name written on it. Noctis goes for the notebook first and scans through each page in horror. There were… very descriptive and disturbing things written in here. It looked like it started as a diary that slowly morphed into various ways of death in general to ways of killing himself. It's… terrible to say the least. The last few pages had the word ‘Bridge’ written on them with the last two pages being a complete suicide note. It pains Noctis to read this. Prompto had been going through so much turmoil and seeing it written only made it more real. These were Prompto’s true feelings. Depression in a nutshell. 

 

The camera, Noctis figures, is just old photos that Prompto had taken. Old memories that, at one point, Prompto would have never saw again. Noctis instead goes to the envelop addressed to him. He opens it slowly. It's a lengthy note but Noctis begins to read it carefully. 

 

_ Hey Noct. So, this is really hard for me to do but there isn't anything else I can do. You're probably confused but by the time you read this, I'm gone from this world. I've finally ended my agony. My body will lay at the bottom of the Insomnia Bridge until someone finds it. Most likely tomorrow morning. You're probably asking yourself, why did I do it? Well it's not as hard to explain as you think. It's simply, I hated myself so much. I was nothing to this world and no one cared about me. I went each passing day pretending that I was okay and I never was. I've spent so many months being sad. I wanted to tell you and the guys about my problems but I knew you guys didn't care about me either. I didn't want your pity, even more, I didn't want you guys to laugh in my face at how pathetic I was. I am pathetic aren't I?  _

 

_ Now I know you don't care but I should let you know a secret I've been keeping. I liked you. Actually as I write this, I might as well say that I loved you. I loved you so much. I've been pinning for you for years and hid my feelings away from you. It's a waste telling you now since I'll never know how you feel. Well I could take a guess. You probably feel nothing for me. I can't believe you've been pretending to be my friend to make me feel better. Jerk move dude. But it's fine because now I'm out of your way. Apart of me wanted to think that you did like me back but I know that's far fetched. You wouldn't want someone like me, I'd just ruin your life with my problems anyways. A prince doesn't need someone so broken like me.  _

 

_ I guess I should say I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not being strong enough to handle this but it's gotten so difficult that I can't live in this cycle of pain and suffering anymore. I love you Noctis and I always will.  _

 

_ Until we meet again,  _

 

_ -Prompto  _

 

Noctis was so completely rattled by this that he begins to cry. He still can't believe Prompto had been feeling this way for so long without his knowledge. Prompto was so close to killing himself and Noctis wouldn't be able to get through his own days without him. Noctis couldn't even think about a life with Prompto not present in it. It pains him. He doesn't want Prompto to ever feel like he's worthless or anything bad ever again. 

 

“Oh y-you found my note…” Noctis jumped at the voice. He looks up and immediately spots Prompto with a towel around his waist. His arms… Noctis sees the scars that littered up both of Prompto’s forearm. His expression change to exasperation upon seeing those faint, some recent, scars. Prompto flinches at the look and quickly grabs one of Noctis’s shirts and sweats retreating back to the bathroom. Noctis sighs and puts the note down and waits. Prompto comes back with clothes on, slowly making his way toward the bed and sits down. He doesn't speak at first and Noctis didn't give him the liberty to. 

 

“I'm sorry for snooping through your bag. I just-” Prompto cut him off. 

 

“It's fine… I… I'm sorry for everything. I've never felt so… so low. Last time this happened, I was talked out of not jumping so easily. This time… I don't think I would have been. I-I was just gonna slide the note under your door and… well…” Prompto looked away. He feels weak right now but he knows Noctis has some care for him, or at least he wants to believe him. It's a finicky situation. Noctis hugs him immediately. 

 

“I'm so happy you didn't jump. I meant everything I said. People care about you so much. Your parents, your friends, me; We all care for you. Always remember that you're liked and that you're worth something to this world.” Noctis held him tightly. He feels Prompto choke out a sob. 

 

“I can't believe I did this again. If I-I didn't come here… I… I…-”

 

“Shhhhh everything's fine now. You're still here and I'm going to help you. I do want you to promise me something.” Noctis pulls back from the hug to look into Prompto’s watery eyes. “Promise me if you ever get this low or feel unwanted, please talk to me. Don't ever think I won't listen.” 

 

“I'll… try. It's s-so hard to talk about my feelings when I think everyone is against me. But… I feel better knowing that you'll listen to me.” Prompto paused and let out a sigh. “I… meant everything in that letter. It's morbid at first but… it's all true. My thoughts, my pain, and… my love for you. It might seem like a moment of weakness, but I've loved you for so long. You don't have to love me back but it's good to get that off my chest. Being your friend is enough.” Prompto gave him a sad smile. He's starting to feel a bit better the more he hears Noctis’s sincere words. Noctis said he liked him but even then it hard to believe it, but Prompto is actually okay with that. He's content with just being his friend. Noctis eyes widen at the words before he pulled Prompto in for another hug. 

 

“I never really thought about my feelings towards you. I know, for sure, I really like you more than a friend and with everything that just transpired, I could not live without you. I… I feel the same way as you do about me.  Believe me when I say this: I love you too Prompto.” Prompto’s eyes widens at the words. His emotions were still heightened. The happiness he feels is overwhelming almost just because he's hasn't been happy in a very long time. What he does in response to those words is an impulse but he hoped Noctis wouldn't change his mind about him. 

 

He kissed him briefly. 

 

He pulled back almost immediately because it's probably not the right time to do this. He's blushing and stammering out an apology only to be silenced by Noctis’s lips. It's a sweet, short kiss; One that Prompto had never thought would happen to him. They pull back from each other both blushing. Prompto gives Noctis the warmest genuine smile he's ever seen. 

 

“Thank you for everything.” Prompto said softly as he brought Noctis back in for a hug. They stay like this for a while. Neither of them wanted to ruin this moment. Prompto has never felt so warm and fuzzy like this, not with his dark thoughts but now, the darkness that had clouded his thoughts were slowly drifting away little by little. He knows it won't be an easy journey to go on but he will do what he can to be and stay truly happy. Noctis would be right by his side. 

 

Prompto had always thought that his life would only be covered in a shadow of sadness but he now feels like there is something to live for especially with Noctis being with him. Things will only get better from here. He's glad he came here last night. 

 

Noctis was the light he needed in his life. 

**Author's Note:**

> I have a semi-happy ending because I always need some happiness with these boys.
> 
> Comments and Kudos are always welcome and make me happy!❤️


End file.
